Posts Tagged ‘personal assistant’

There are certain things in life that make things easier for me. A great example is that “personal assistant” on my phone that is meant to make things totally hands free while I am driving. But what happens when things go wrong? What random things does this insolent creature do against me, despite my best efforts? I really think my assistant conspires with The Wife to make me look stupid.

assistant

Me: Assistant.
Assistant: How may I help you?
Me: Text The Wife.
Assistant: What is the message?
Me: I called and they said this week. (referring to someone I called…they said this week.)
Assistant: Sending, I carved in a turkey creek.
Me: WHAT?!? Cancel. CANcel. CANCEL!
Assistant: Message sent.
Me: Oh freakin wonderful…
Assistant: Message from The Wife, LMAO Huh???
Me: Assistant
Assistant: How may I help you?
Me: Text The Wife.
Assistant: Searching “test”.
Me: NO! Text The Wife!
Me: Cancel!
Assistant: Found 10 Million results for “test”.
Me: Seriously?!?
Assistant: Searching Serenity.
Me: CANCEL!!!

Yup. It’s definitely a conspiracy.

Today’s random thought:
Christian Bale would have made a better Neo…